Tuesday, September 2, 2008

I feel as though I've been a special brand of "Crazy" lately. My mom used to tell me that she would get horrible depression during her pregnancies, but as soon as the baby would be born, she would be back to normal.
My pregnancy with Ava was so fun. Easy. Exciting. This pregnancy is so odd. Nothing feels the same. I'm super emotional. Chris can say the most innocent things to me, and for the next hour or two I can't stop crying my eyes out. I have no appetite at all, and am scared that when I go to the doctor that my weight won't have changed the way it's supposed to. I'm now officially in trimester two, and it seems I'm only getting more emotionally unstable. Ava grounds me though. I have started to come up with projects to do when time is passing to keep my mind occupied. I've never experienced anything like this on a consistent basis. I don't think dangerous thoughts, just very sad ones. Is this normal? Will it last the entire pregnancy? What more can I do to balance myself so that my family doesn't deal with Moaning Myrtle? So many questions...no real answers. Don't get me wrong ...I'm not sad all the time, it's just...it hits out of nowhere.

In other news...I made some tie blankets yesterday. With the weather so cold and yucky, and the fleece on sale at joann...I went and bought 3 blankets worth. I got done with 2 before my back screamed NO MORE!!!!!!! One was for Sa-J, and the other was for me, but Ava has claimed it. It's BEAUTIFUL. She's way into walking around with a blanket wrapped on her like a cape or beautiful shawl. I'm excited to finish the last one. Then I want to go out and get some cross stitching stuff and start learning. Kira is moving at the end of the month--this makes me sad, but it's an amazing oppertunity for their family--so it makes me happy too. My best friend is going to be MIA for a year or two. Ok time for Ava's nap and for me to force myself to eat.


Bilary said...

Oh man. I'm sorry you are having a hard time. I know how you are feeling as far as being in the dumps once in a while. Let me know if you need anything. Hormones suck!!!

Candace said...

Sorry your feeling down. I hate feeling that way. Let me know as well if I can do anything to help you out.:)

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